why should i want to live
if you dont want to love.

I can live without you but without you I'd be miserable at best

I can't live without you.
Don't leave me.

I wish you could see this.

fuck yeah

again

lololollololollolololollololoolololzach

ohhhh my silly zachy poo...
way to be awkward.
lulz.

studying for networking is going to be awfully hard this summer
^^

you  know, with richie and what not.

I'm graduating in 2 days, and i didnt know where its at until like, 2 days ago, and i didnt find out when and where the practice is until today.

fail

i found something that's been missing for a long time.

I'm not ok.

I'm so fucking pisssed.

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
i cant even be bothered to use real language.

i fucking hate people
i fucking hate new england
and i dont want to fucking go
i dont fucking want anything to do with any one.
everyone pisses me off.
everyone has to know my business.
everyone has to tell me what the fuck to do.


for future reference, i hate you.
i hate you and everything to do with you.


I'd probably kill myself if it weren't for Richie.

I dont want anyone to care about me anymore.
i just want a job and to live my life how i fucking want to.

stop fucking tooling on me becuase i dont have a job, stop fucking telling me i should go into baking, stop fucking telling me i should go into networking, stop fucking tooling on me because i dont have my goddamn license. stop fucking talking to me.
stop telling me to stop whining like a little bitch, because as long as you're around, i'm going to.
stop telling me im your best friend and then going out of your way to piss me off.
stop. stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.
I don't care.
i WONT have sex with you, I WONT let you touch my boobs, I WONT let you touch me at all. get the fuck out of my life.
Im sick of people trying to take advantage of me.
I 'm sick of everyone trying to get me and richie to break up, its a wasted effort because its not fucking going to happen.

Dont not talk to me for months or weeks and then try and tell me were friends. or you love me
or any of that shit.
because its not true.
I really need to get rid of every form of contact with the outside world, except for a phone, so i can still talk to richie. but other than that, I dont talk to anyone else. noone makes an effort to talk to me, so why should i make an effort to talk to them, if im not worth their time, then they arent worth mine.
dont tell me you can tolerate me and im an alright gal and then talk shit about me.
dont fuck with me head.
dont call me a whore and tell me youre kidding.. EVERY FUCKING DAY.
the joke is old. or maybe its not a joke, i dont fucking care anymore.

I only need three people to have a fanfuckingtastic life. Richie, my mommy and my grampa, if your name isnt there, its because you never talk to me, or you make my life hell, or i just dont want anything to do with you. and talking to me once a month, doesnt count as talking to me. 
if you never tell me a single thing that goes on in your life, then why should you be a part of mine.

I fucking hate this whole being alive thing.

I love Richie.